讽刺

昨晚你问我还生气你吗，我问你对你很重要吗？
你说对，因为你还把我当成是你的好朋友。
说真的，我觉得还满讽刺的。
我已经没有生你的气了，可是要我把你再当成好朋友有点办不到。
坦白的说，我觉得是我个人的问题吧？
一旦受过一次伤害，永远就不会忘记。
然后远离会让我受伤的人，事，物。
你并没有带给我任何伤害，只是对你失望透顶了。
同样的原理，失望一次就够了。
有时候，朋友带来的伤害比情人的更痛。
也许是我把朋友看的太重了。
好吧~ 我不会改！
但，我会收敛啦！
如果Renee看到这句一定会大笑。
我知道你在看啦，尽情的笑吧~ =)

初恋

突然想起他，不知道他最近过的还好吗？
恨他吗？不会。还爱他吗？不爱。
想起他只是一种对朋友的想念而已。
有人说，初恋永远都是最美的回忆。
也有人说，初恋永远都是最痛的回忆。
但对我来说，初恋只是我回忆的一部分。
它既没有带给我深刻的美或深刻的痛，它就像一杯白开水。
是他对不起我，他劈腿。失望吗？有点。
因为我说过，如果他爱上其他人，就坦白的告诉我。
我会放他走，可是他选择隐。
口里说爱我，可是却抱着其他女生。
讽刺吧？也许这就是现实的残酷，无法改变的事实。
我不在意他要分手，可是我却生气他对我的隐瞒。
我以为他明白我的，可是男生有时候真的很犯贱。
与其说不伤心，不如说早就知道是这样的结局？
我了解他的为人，也清楚他的性格。
可是我却执著开始这样的恋情。
因为，我相信不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有。
他呢，其实是一个很幼稚的人。
害怕被伤害，所以选择伤害别人来保护自己。
我和他都是同一种人，也许根本不适合在一起。
后悔和他在一起吗？还好。
因为毕竟曾经相爱过，有过美好的回忆。
再美好的回忆也会变淡如果没有保温。
回想起以前的曾经，就好像看一部电影。
一部不刺激，也不沉闷的电影。平淡如水。
这就是我的初恋。

29/5/2010

I don't know what I'm doing recently. Feel like I'm lost. Demotivated. Who am I? Or what am I? Why I'm here? What extacly is going on outside the world? I do not know anything. Question without answer. Even don't know what i am typing now. SIGH. What is the reason for me to continueing live on? I do not know. I want answer. Past? What have i done in the past actually? Present? What I am doing now? Future? Do I have one? I'm lost again. Or I already lost from the begining? ARGHHHHHHH :*(

TOTALLY PISSED OFF

Dont judge the book by its cover, totally agreed with this.
The people that i thought is trustworthy but actually is not.
The people that i thought is not that reliable but is actually trustworthy.
Honestly, i never met someone that such a "DUMB ASS"
Sorry to be rude, but i think he really "BRAINLESS"
I might not the cleverest, but at least i use my brain.
I might not mature enough, but at least i'm not that childist like him.
I mignt not 100% reliable, but at least i will try my best to finish my task.
Even if i cant finish it, I wont come out such a rubbish reasons.
Maybe he got do, but wont you think that he is a bit late to start?
We blame him because we care about our future.
If he dont care about his future then please dont put us in risk.
We're not that smart, we need to score high marks in assignment.
If he really cant do, please tell us EARLIER.
Even if late also nevermind, BUT PLEASE TELL LA!
Ignore call, msg, pm! WTH!!!
At the begining keep said very easy larr.. no need rush...
Hey dude, you think you still in high school ar?
I know he recently very BUSY
But BUSY also please dont forget to do your work lar!
Oya.. forget he dont use his brain to think one.
cannot differenciate which one is more important. PAISEH!

I know you might see this post but i dont care.
I know recently i very lan c to you, do you know why?
Because when you are too disappointed on someone,
You will choose to be away from someone ,
And no longer want to care about someone.
Ya, I'm sick of it , your attitude.
Im rude to you but dont you think you also got problem too!
Im a person who can easily get angry
but i never angry a person without purpose!
however i can hate a person without a reason.
You want du lan me or hate me or whatever,
up to you, i dont care. N.L.J.Y , im tired to communicate with you already.

Thing changed mean it changed.
There is no turning point for you to go back.
There is not point for you to apologize.
No need to waste your time to say sorry to me.
I had enough DISAPPOINTMENTS from you.
There is no way i will get any of it from you anymore.
I'm not that stupid to let myself involve in such situation again.

Everything is OVER now.

Friend

Dont you think you are abit too late to ask me, "Are you okay?". When i was freaking moody and i needed your accompany and you are not there for me. Well, this is what you call friend? My friend, you really disappointed me. I think is my fault too because expect too much from you. When i was damn moody, they are here for me. I really glad that i met such a good friend even though i never expect anything from them. Thanks to Cleona for accompany me all the time and gave me lots of advices. Thanks to Vincent for picked me up at Spinky and save me from a pervert guy (LOL!!). Thanks to Ah Yaw and Jia Ye for accompany Cleona and I to 7-11. Last night i enjoy alot of fun with them :) Well, beside them i also need to say thank you to Aaron gor gor. :) He said, Whatever happen, you still have me :)) Honestly, i never expect anything from them but they gave me support and concern when i was not in good mood. Love you guys so so so so much lar!!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha :)

I'm single again :)

Hey! You know what? I'm back to single ! Well, to be honest is my boy friend dont want me. I mean, my ex boy friend. When he said he had something to tell me i know what he want to tell me. Honestly, I really dont sad because i also planning to break with him. But since he want to say it first then let he be the one who say first. The reason that i want to break up with him is i dont love him anymore. However, the reason that he dumb me is fucking bullshit. He said, at the second week in NS he had another girl. He said now he already break up with her but he want to tell me thr truth and broke up with me. Well, i told him before if he found another girl that he truely love her, i can accept it and let you go. But you choose to lie to me because he know that the girl dont mind he got girl friend. I dont feel sad you know. I just feel dissapointed on him. Because I still love him LAST TIME but not now. Imagine that he telling me he love me but hugging other girl. THIS REALLY FUCKING BULLSHIT! Tonight i drunk not because u dumb me is because you cheated on me. Tonight I smoked because i know you dont like people smoke. But not that nice to smoke. I know you are coward. Even break up also need to use sms. I'm brave to call you and let you know that you made me disappointed. Dont you expect me to hate you because you not worth for me to hate you. You are wasting my TIME and MONEY! LIM KA VUI, you are no longer live inside my heart. WELL, since last two week ago i already realize that. HAHA! As a conclusion, IM SINGLE AGAIN! WOOTS!!

21/5/2010

刚从 Thriller Night 回来，好累。说真的，上次的 Pyjamas Party 比较好玩。原来在这世界上，真的有各种各样的人。经过这晚，想通了也心淡了。有些东西变质了，就真的变质了，回不到最初的起点。此时此刻的我，想念以前的朋友。怀念以前一起疯癫的日子，一起努力的日子。Darling 们，真的真的好想你们。有时候，真的觉得无法透气，快要窒息了。世界有太多的变数了，我应付不了。真心的朋友在那里？寂寞啊寂寞，空虚啊空虚，你们可以不要来找我吗？为何连微笑也要变的那么委屈那么累？不想了，心累了。晚安吧

21/5/2010

Feel moody and kinda stress now. Feel stress because havent do my assignmentss yet and English quiz is on next Monday. Feel moody because I dont know what I want. I think is better to be like this way? Perhaps? I wonder ? Whatever la. Like what i always said, You want how then how la. I dont care~ HAHA! Oya~ Happy Birthday to my dear dear JIE JIE :) RENEE~~~~

18/05/10

Pictures Time :P

Lionel and Cleona.

We do our maths revision after my computing class. Actually just me and Lionel only, that Cleona just wait for me to back hostel.

Vincent and Nicholas.
Nicholas follow us back to hostel because of the rain and the terrible trafic jam. We had dinner together at the cafe there. We are Melissa, Cleona, Nicholas, Vincent , Ah Yaw, Jia Ye and Kenny. Eat dinner also need to play laptop. Zzz

Nicholas, Kenny, Ah Yaw, Jia Ye and Vincent.
After dinner, they said want to play dota at the 1st floor. I need to follow them because that Lousy Ppl , Nicholas Low needed my laptop to play Dota. His Macbook Pro cannot play waa.. He even used mine Study Skill Assignment paper as a mouse pad! Arrrghhhhhhh....

All so concentrate on their screen! PEACE!! Take stupid picture because felt bored;

Woots~ Holding Nicholas's head!!!!!! I know is lame :P

That's all for today :) The end.

Old Friend =)

照片里的男生绝对绝对不是我的男朋友哦 。他呢，是我的老朋友吧? 算起来我们认识因该快六年了，我会认识他是因为我们是同班同学。我们初一的时候就同班了，可是那一年我们连一句话都没有讲过吧？哈哈 。 原以为不可能会和他有任何的交际可是命运却安排他坐我隔壁 。 就这样把不同世界的人连接起来 。 说了那么多，差点忘了介绍他。他叫张宇诚 ，狮子座 。生性温驯 ，高材生 。我们曾经冷战半年 ，难以相信吧 ？好吧 ，那时侯的我不可否认是很刁蛮和任性 。一切都是我在闹 ，耍大小姐脾气 。他偶尔会欺负我 ，可是不能否认他对我很好 。当我有任何心事 ，他都很有耐性听我诉苦 。当我不开心的时候 ，他也愿意听我发牢骚 。他功课一向比我好所以初四的时候就分班了 。说真的那时侯满难过的 。虽然分班了 ，也比较少机会见面了 ，可是我们的友谊依然不变 。虽然他的嘴巴有时候有点贱 ，也常放我飞机 ，可是无可否认他是一位很好很好的朋友。依照往常我的作风 ，他目前因该还是单身 。如果对他有兴趣的话 ，不妨联络我吧 ！我可以介绍他给你认识哦 ！当然不要忘了请我喝茶哦 ~ 哈哈哈哈哈哈

Form 2 的我们 ，回忆总是美丽的

傻傻的当时 ，动人的回忆

在海边的聚会拍的

Form 5 的我们 ，不再是傻傻的当时了 。是时候带着我们的希望飞翔 ，追寻各自的梦想 。

2010 , May 15

Yesterday was the computing quiz. Finally, is over but next week still have quiz for Finite Maths. Sigh. My life is filled with lots of quizzes and assignments. Now i just understand how is the life of a college student. Pheww~ Now started to like weekend because no need wake up early in the morning. Today woke up around 10 o'clock then watch movie that i "steal" from IP MAN; which is Vincent. I watched until 2pm something then called Ah Yaw accompany me go eat my breakfast+lunch. We met at gfloor around 2.30pm. We went to "Spinky" to have my lunch. We chit-chat about study,life,friends, and LOVE! HAHA. Then we went to Giant to buy something. Our next destination is McD because need to help my roommate buy her lunch too. We saw Shi wei, Ling Wei, Kok Hao and Christ Low(i think is he.. XP). I really have no idea why are they in McD during weekend. Anyway, due to i want to eat seaweed so we went to 7-11 to look for my wasabi seaweed. Unfortunately there is no wasabi seaweed for me :( so i bought the spicy one :) After that, Ah Yaw accompany me to B2 which Help Resident's Launderette located at, in order to collect my cloths ^.^ We drop by at the cafe and i bought a drinks! Ah Yaw then accompany to my room because i have too many things to carry so he help lend me a hand :) How nice and gentleman is he^.^ Well, like always what i did to my friends, He is still available so contact me if you want to find him. LOL!!! hahaha.. I had dinner with Cleone, Tom Yam Maggi! lol.. We watch shuttle island in her room. The movie was damn boring. HAha.. THat's all for today, bye bye =)

我了解了，明白了，不管了，也管不了

累了，麻木了，也无言了

你想要怎样就怎样吧
你开心就好了=)

我的世界不可能为任何人停顿

就算有那一瞬间

我也会努力让自己快乐起来

瞬间的友谊，瞬间的快乐

到最后，我还是我

"Melissa is still Melissa

No matter what happen

I am who I am"

你现在到底想怎样嘛

一时对我那么坏

一时对我不理不睬

不要对我那么“串”，好吗？

我会受不了啦！

对啦，我对你很坏

对不起啦，不是故意的

有时候对你很“串”

那是因为有时候

你说的话好像一把刀

插进我心里

我才会忍不住“串”回你啦

有时候不理你

是因为“无言”

真的不想和你吵架

真的不想发你脾气

你的忽冷忽热

快要让我抓狂

Happy Three Friends

Mei Mei , Stupiak, Jie Jie
I bought these from MidValley
At first just plan to buy for Renee only
But i found my name and Nicholas too
So i bought it for three of us
This is just like a link of our friendship
We may not really understand each other well
But through the time we spend together everyday
We will know and understand each other more and more
I'm really glad to met them
We share happiness, sadness, and laughter together
Well, let me introduce my DEAR... JIE JIE
Renee, the pretty girl among us
Nice, Kind and friendly
Sorry to say that she is not available :D
She is the eldest and that's why i call her Jie Jie
TEEHEE !!!!!
The next one is Nicholas
well, i introduce him before
If wanna know more about him
read the previous blog :P

好久没有上来更新最近的心情了
没有那个冲动还是厌倦了或是怕了
不管怎样都好，我还是来了
在这个时刻，心里有种说不出的郁闷
心里好像有个大石头，快要窒息了
有谁帮我移走那个大石头？
怎么了？我到底怎么了？
微笑不见了，快要笑不出来了
有谁能借我微笑？ 不想变回以前的我
连微笑也要假装，我不要这样的生活
压力，压力，还是压力
微笑吧，圆圆！ 努力的笑吧！

1/5/2010

Dear diary, today is just another boring day. Wake up early in the morning and have my lunch at Ali Maju. Then meet Lional them at McD to finish our project. After that, back hostel and online. I suppose to study or do revision but i just cannot concentrate :( Never mind, tomorrow will be better. Watch Gossip Girl today but i don't like it cause is boring! I know Cleona will kill me if she find out that i say Gossip Girl is boring! Haha ;D Read the novels that i bought yesterday. Story is okay but not my favorite type! Yesterday midnight i finish watching Dexter. I don't like the ending :( It was a sad ending! Even though the ending is not what i expect but overall still consider NICE =) You should watch it but if you are coward then forget about it! Because you will see A LOT of blood @.@ O ya, he will going back to camp tomorrow :( Will miss him ! Room is in messy condition again xP Tomorrow need to tidy my room! Hahahaha :D At this momment, miss SABAH so much!
~I miss my television :(
~I miss my friends :(
~I miss Metro :(
~I miss kkbox :(
~I miss Kk food :(
~I want back kk lar!! haha :P