12.11.2010

Yesterday was miserable. My heart sank and I could feel a lump in my throat.
Darkness mercifully engulfed me, and tears welled up in my eyes.
I could not handle the emotions that filled me at the realization that you are actually using me.
What are you thinking? I don't know and no longer want to know.
You have hurt me until my heart is broke and cannot be mend.
I'm tired to catch up your pace, I give up.
You now can enjoy your life without me. Good bye.

Yesterday, I felt emptiness and loneliness.
I was all alone in my room, I can't find anyone can to talk with.
It felt like I was walking against the strong wind at the road all by myself.
I try to find someone in my friend list, but there is no reply from anyone.

My world turned upside down.
I was exasperated and heartbroken and had no idea how to recover.
Breath, I told myself. I decided to go for a walk, I can't stand for it anymore.
I called someone to accompany me to have a walk.
I don't want to stay in the room alone!
I went to the supermarket, I walked like a zombie, aimless.
I have no idea what to buy, all I knew was just keep walking.

Dark clouds were just at the right timing, I could feel  the raindrops on my face.
Tears and raindrops mixed together naturally, like they were born to meet each other.
I no longer can differentiate tears and raindrops.
Disheartened, you brought a mountain of sorrow to me.
Every inch of my being ached in extremed pain, but you know nothing about it.
All you know is you, yourself.

I can give you all I have but not my pride.
My pride is the only thing that I cannot give out.
If you don't love me, please don't fool me with your dirty tricks.
I had enough of sorrow that you brought to me!
I cannot take it anymore, I give up.
You are making my heart dying, and I'm not that twit to let you success.

Is time for me to say goodbye to you.
Is time for me to love myself more.
Is time for me to protect my pride.

I'm fine if my life without you,
even though is hard at the beginning,
but I know I can overcome the obstacle.

Without you,
I still have my family and friends beside me.
You are not the Sun and I'm not the earth.
I'm just who I am. I'm an independent single lady.
And my name is Melissa Sen =)